Learning to release our children has been difficult for me and has required a deep trust in God. But releasing and trusting can be done when we believe God is in control.
Learning to Release is Similar to a Ride
Standing in line for the Musical Express, I watched the rider’s faces as it spun around in endless circles with the high pitched music blaring in the background.
Some smiled or laughed while others looked terrified unable to fully enjoy the experience.
As we boarded, thinking we knew what to expect, I felt slightly apprehensive and vulnerable. It’s the feeling that hits when a situation is beyond our ability to control the outcome.
We tried to emotionally prepare ourselves before the ride started, but the biggest trick was to know when and where to hold on and when it was time to let go and just enjoy the ride.
It reminded me of how I feel at times learning to release our children into new stages of life.
Life often seems to mimic the Musical Express ride; spinning around slightly out of our comfort zone. This sense of losing control is heightened when one of our children is attempting something new or entering into a new season.
Preparation for Release
When our children are young, we watch them closely, but holding their hand and guiding them is just preparation for their eventual release into life experiences without us.
As they grow, the outcome of the choices they make is out of our control. We can endeavor to teach and prepare them, but at some point, we must release them from the grip our heart has on their destiny.
This is especially crucial when they leave home for the first time whether to travel, attend college, marriage or a new job.
7 Truths to Help Release our Children
These 7 truths have helped me trust that God is with my children even when they struggle, feel afraid or alone:
Realize and believe that our children are a gift from God and He loves them infinitely more than we do. “Children are a gift from the Lord;
they are a reward from him.” Psalm 127:3 NLT
Start at a young age to release your children to age and maturity appropriate experiences.
Fill your life with other purposeful activities that fulfill you emotionally, practically, spiritually and physically.
Communicate your feelings to others who have gone before you and those who are walking beside you and seek wise counsel.
Trust that God is always in control even when the outcome is not what you counted on or expected.
Remember your own childhood and the greatest seasons of learning were not when walking beside a parent holding hands but when you stepped out and did something on your own.
Pray to God that as you release your children, they will be drawn to Him and all the goodness and grace that He offers. “…you will receive the gift of the Holy Spirit. This promise is to you, to your children, and to those far away–all who have been called by the Lord our God.” Acts 2:38-39 NLT
Just like a ride on the Musical Express, knowing when it is time to hold on and when it is time to let go of our children will provide everyone with a much better ride.
There is freedom trusting God that is only available when we put our faith in Him instead of our own strong grip.
When we Release our Children it Leads them to God
When we begin to release our children, we can enjoy each stage of their childhood feeling less afraid. Our children gain self confidence and self assurance in stages, so they are ready to leap into opportunities.
God is able to speak to them directly and they learn to hear His voice, so they can develop a personal relationship with Him which is the ultimate goal.
This relationship with Christ is what will help their release be one where they become people with a strong character and a love for others.
For insight on how to establish healthy boundaries for your children: https://www.boundariesbooks.com/boundaries-books/boundaries-with-kids/
Mary Rooney Armand loves to write inspiring, faith based stories. She focuses on helping others grow in their intimacy with Christ and thrive in their personal relationships. Mary lives in New Orleans with her husband Cory and four children. Besides writing, she teaches Bible Studies and leads small groups. In 2020 she created ButterflyLiving and a Bible Study titled “Identity” which is available on Amazon. To learn more visit maryarmand.com.